Everyone has an insight, a voice that comes from within ones soul. This is the voice responsible in influencing and directing us throughout our life.
It involves transforming yourself and taking charge of your life. If you stay stagnant then life will not happen for you. You might never experience the true potential of yourself.
Life is not only about the style of living, sleeping, eating, working and travelling but to explore, experiment, observe, thoughtful processes and taking risks towards change.
Change leads to improvement. So an important question is how to improve? How to bring about change within one’s self?
For that purpose, what you need to do is to take actionable steps to improve yourself. Push yourself out of the traditional and comfort zone, family values, controlling powers of other human beings and meet the real you! This will definitely transform your life.
Why does success only come to those who work harder for it?
It is because millions of people have no idea what are they capable of doing. Following conservative ways to live life blindly is no different than being dead, doing nothing and simply copying.
Ask yourself, “Are you a copycat?”
Before even considering using manifestation for money (and anything else for that matter), get ready and be open for change that you have never experienced before. You will be challenged to get out of your comfort zone and live the life that you’ve always dreamt of.
You are free to live in your own unique way with a strong identity rather than being a copy of others. If you strive for change, you can build a world of success of your own.
Shake off the insecurities, confusions and doubts to enhance confidence, power and ability to attain your heart’s desire.
Let’s begin with what we mean by manifestation.
It refers to the process, an action or an event that clearly enables us to see or show us something abstract or conceptual.
Basically it is indicating the movement of transformation of a mind concept into a reality-based act. That is why we stress upon taking action to bring your thoughts, feelings and ideas into a tangible experience.
You Are Important
Your life has a goal, which is to win. Winners are leaders, those who lead life in their own way and leave their legacy behind.
The one thing that holds us back from creating our legacy is in our subconscious mind; our past, our mistakes, our regrets and unpleasant memories. Left unchecked, all of this no doubt holds you back from progressing and achieving what you desire.
The human mind has an inborn tendency to seek and grasp on negativity. Biologically, there is a part of our brain called the “lizard brain” that is the oldest part of our brain stem, responsible for the most basic of instincts; survival. This part of the brain governs our flight or fight attitude towards challenges and breaking comfort zones and is designed to keep us safe from harm.
I know no one really wants to live a life of drudgery, producing nothing, being stuck in a 9 to 5 job doing the same thing over and over again just to pay bills. That is a very distorted and warped version of life. Some people die at 25 years old and don’t get buried until they are 79 years old.
Financial success is a major goal for the majority of people on the planet because having a lack of finances is a real pain point. If you have very little disposable income, it is very difficult to live life to the fullest.
This doesn’t mean you need to strive to be filthy rich, but rather to have a degree of financial independence where you have enough to not worry about it. This is not the same as greed although some folks will call you greedy for wanting more!
Think less, speak less, and observe more with your eyes and your heart. It takes faith, action and the belief that you will succeed.
You will get to where you want to be. Trust in yourself, your capacity and your ability to achieve it.
The key to unlocking your true spirit and road to find the peak of manifestation is to “Be Consistent And Never Give Up” because true change takes consistency and this is how the law of attraction works.
The Law Of Attraction
As you may be aware, the law of attraction has been around for centuries. In the past, people used to meditate and calm their mind and visualize and force themselves to believe that whatever they wanted was already in existence for them to manifest it in reality.
This was an uphill task because as human beings we’ve been conditioned with negative beliefs since young. These beliefs may have been passed down by our parents, teachers, other adults, friends, etc.
As a result, when we try to believe in the impossible, our subconscious minds do not align with our positive thoughts because deep down we feel like we’re lying to ourselves.
Thanks to technological advances, we’re now understanding that beta and theta waves can be used to reprogram our mind with positive beliefs and clear out the negative beliefs. It’s akin to starting with a clean slate.
Whether you believe in manifestation or the Law of Attraction or not, it is definitely big business and if you aren’t achieving the levels of success in your own life, it may be worth putting your cynicism to one side and giving it a try. What do you have to lose?
One of the top selling products that uses a set of audios to transform your mind was created by Eddie Sergey and it’s called 15 Minute Manifestation.
15 Minute Manifestation Review
This product has sold thousands of copies and has been an online bestseller for years. Let’s see why it’s so popular…
The Good Points:
The beauty of 15 Minute Manifestation is its simplicity. Listening to audios is a breeze. No need to write down anything or concentrate and visualize in a meditative pose. If you’re new to reprogramming your mind, this product is perfect for you.
There are many positive reviews and testimonials from customers. This is great social proof that the product works.
15 Minute Manifestation has been an online bestseller for years. That inspires more confidence.
Removing these obstacles on your own is a Herculean task because they’re embedded deep in your subconscious mind.
With the audios in 15 Minute Manifestation, the negative beliefs that are holding you back will be removed when you listen to the first audio in the series – The Natural State. This is a great way to start your journey.
The second audio, ‘Your New Story’ will help you create positive, life changing beliefs so that you elevate yourself to the next level where success is achieved with a lot less effort, since you’re no longer getting in your own way.
In the third audio, ‘Moving Towards Abundance’, your mind will be gently trained to manifest results at an accelerated rate. You’ll start feeling better and notice that positive results are coming every which way you turn. This is a good place to be in.
This step-by-step easy to follow method will encourage consistency. So many people start off motivated with other law of attraction methods, but after a while they stop because they lose interest.
With this method, you can just play the audios and do other stuff while the sounds work on your subconscious mind.
You get 3 audios (15 minutes each) and you need to listen to each audio once every single day for a week. This will last for 21 days which is enough time to make this practice a habit… and you’ll be much more likely to manifest your desires.
A special technology is used to create these ‘theta wave’ audios which are received more easily by your subconscious mind.
The Bad Points:
The sales copy is a little unbelievable and may raise red flags for people who are more cynical.
The whole story about Eddie having brain cancer and curing himself by listening to binaural beats seems a bit far-fetched. It may have been true or maybe it’s just marketing hype. Whatever the case, the product works and the wall of testimonials on the official website is proof of this.
This product is only available online. So, you will need a debit/credit card to purchase it.
Those who prefer reading books to listening to audios may not like this product because it’s completely audio-based.
Should You Get It?
After watching the video on the official website, there’s no denying that the product does seem awesome. The good news is that you can try it risk-free because of the 60-day money back guarantee.
This is more than enough time to effect change in your life by listening to the audios daily. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose.
The system itself is easy to follow. Unlike other visualization methods that require concentration, the 15 Minute Manifestation audios program your mind with theta waved with no effort on your part.
So, this product is definitely worth getting and testing. Once you start manifesting what you want in your life, you’ll probably end up becoming one of the positive reviews on that site.
Give it a try and watch your life transform before your eyes.
Let me ask you something? Is happiness a choice? Can people really choose to feel happy or not?
There are conflicting studies and opinions about general happiness and choosing to be happy. Both arguments have merit, but the truth seems to be somewhere in the middle.
There are certain conditions that do affect one’s ability to choose happiness such as depression and other mood disorders. Some people have difficulty controlling emotions, but it’s a skill that can be learned with practice.
Before jumping right in and learning ways to increase happiness, you need to learn about conditions that may make it difficult to will yourself to be happy. Depression and other mood disorders, ADHD, PTSD, a disability, grief, or poverty make choosing to be happy more challenging.
If you are dealing with any of these issues, there are still practical ways you can increase your happiness, but it may be more difficult. Keep in mind that change takes time, but it is achievable.
Choosing To Be Happy
Choosing to be happy is more than just willing yourself to feel happy. Part of it is thinking positively and thinking happy thoughts, but there are also more practical ways to make yourself happier.
Temperament is partly genetic, but it can still be improved with practice. Below you will learn about some things that you can do in each area to make yourself happy.
Improve Social Relationships
Improve current relationships by reaching out more often, opening lines of communication about past negative experiences, forgiving or seeking forgiveness, or making more time for your friends and family.
Make an effort to make new friends. Take on a new hobby, take a class, join a club, or go to different places in order to meet new people. You can also reach out to others online through social media or dating apps. Don’t be afraid to talk to new people and exchange phone numbers with people you get along with.
Invite friends and family members out for lunch, shopping, or have them over for coffee. Reach out. It can be tempting to wait for others to make the first move so be bold and take the initiative yourself; I’m sure your friends and family will truly appreciate you making the effort to reach out to them.
Improve Temperament And Adaptation
Practice pausing before you react to something. Give yourself a moment to get your emotions in check so that you respond in the way that you really want to rather than having an outburst.
This is a skill that can have a profound effect on both you and those around you; no-one likes to be around someone who gets moody or angry at the drop of a hat.
So, when something triggers you, pause, take a breath and think about how you would want someone to treat you in this situation.
Try to be more open to other people’s ideas and practice letting go of your need to control.
Improve Your Finances
Increase your income by finding a new job, asking for a raise, or taking on a second job. This is not always easy and can be risky, but could definitely be worth it in the long run.
Be open to other career paths. It’s very easy to become comfortable in your career, but is it really what you want to do? Being stuck in a job/career that doesn’t inspire you can be a real drain on your happiness; it’s not just about money, but the sense of fulfillment you get out of what you do.
Look for things you can do to earn a passive income. This is where the internet can come in to play.
There has never been a better time to start an online business and this could just be a side hustle to help you make a mortgage or car payment and if you can set up a business with a recurring monthly payment for customers, all the better.
Pay off debt or avoid taking on debt. if you have any debt, but especially large amounts of debt, this should be an absolute priority for you before anything else. This can be quite painful to begin with but you must take responsibility and deal with it and by doing so, you can feel much happier about yourself.
Set a budget and stick with it so you can have money to do the things that are important to you. Linked to the point above about debt, stop spending money that you don’t have on things you don’t need!
Embrace Or Change Society And Culture
Embrace local culture and society if they’re a positive influence in your life. Learn, explore, and enjoy your environment and the people you share it with.
Don’t be afraid to change your environment or seek change in your current one. Do what you can to be a positive influence. Stand up for what you believe in and speak out against social injustice.
Choose a positive mantra and repeat it several times a day. Positive thinking may feel and sound a little cliched but it does work to put you in a better frame of mind.
Keep a gratitude journal or make a list of things you’re grateful for. Gratitude is really powerful and you do have a lot to be grateful for.
Here is an article about the science of gratitude and if you really want to take your gratitude practice to the next level, then take a look at the Grateful Mind training here as it is a fantastic course all about using gratitude in your life.
Make sure you’re not practicing negative self talk, and if you are, change your inner monologue.
Watch comedies and do other things that will make you laugh more. Laughter really is the best medicine 😁
Practice smiling even when you don’t feel like it. People smile because they’re happy, but people also become happier when smiling.
You can choose to be happy, but it’s more than just saying “I’m happy”.
Choosing to be happy is choosing to focus on the good in your life, and having the courage to make changes in your life that will lead you to more happiness. You have options and you can choose to be happy.
Do More in Less Time – And Have More Time for Yourself
Getting things done brings such a great feeling of accomplishment, but it can also be overwhelming if the task seems insurmountable. Sometimes, the days just don’t seem long enough to do everything we want to do. When that happens, worry can set in, but it doesn’t have to!
It all begins with a solid foundation of time management and scheduling. It’s okay if you’re not a good time manager right now, you can learn to be. It just takes a little bit of practice and you’ll soon be getting more and more done.
When you see how much you’re accomplishing, you’ll work even harder during your busy times, and enjoy those down times more thoroughly.
These scheduling strategies will help you become an expert manager of your time:
Schedule Your Life For Maximum Benefit
You can avoid procrastination and the big stressed-out rush to meet a deadline by scheduling each day and using just a bit of self-discipline to stick to your schedule.
- It helps to break things down into smaller tasks. For example, do you have a big presentation coming up at work in two weeks? Don’t try to do it the night before it’s due. Start now. Working for just a half hour each day can help you get that presentation done with plenty of time to spare.
- It removes wasteful practices from your day. By scheduling your day according to your priorities, you can better utilize the time that you might otherwise have wasted doing unproductive things, like watching television or waiting for the next item on your to-do list to come to you.
Disallow Doubts From Getting In Your Way
That little voice in the back of your mind that tells you, “It’s too much work,” or “It’s not going to happen,” doesn’t know what it’s talking about!
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Keep that thought in mind as you go through your day. The more you think it – or even say it out loud – the more you’ll internalize and believe it.
- Remember your capabilites. When you remind yourself how much you’re capable of doing, you’ll work harder so you can reap the rewards of being done with work.
- No matter how you reward yourself, make it a point to do so regularly. Finished that presentation? Take the evening off and watch your favorite movie! Whatever reward works for you is a good one – as long as the work’s done first.
Recognize When You’re Getting Stressed
Sometimes, in an effort to get more done, you’ll find that you aren’t getting the time for yourself that you’d hoped for. When this happens, stop and reassess your schedule.
- Are you following your agenda? Are you productive during your scheduled working times? Are you meeting your goals? Where can you make changes for better success?
- Do you concentrate and get your work done during your working hours? If not, you may find that you still have to work when you should be relaxing. This is a vicious circle that leaves you feeling stressed, while getting nowhere.
Eliminate Stressors And Build In Stress Relief
Think about the following as you go about your workday:
- By focusing during working hours, you’ll complete each task much sooner. Get your drudgery tasks out of the way as quickly as possible to make more time for more enjoyable tasks.
- Work time is for work only – so avoid distractions. Ringing phones and other issues can stop you from accomplishing your work. Forward calls to your voice mail and establish “do not disturb” times. You’ll be amazed at how much work you can get done without distractions!
- If you complete your tasks early, keep working until your schedule says it’s time to stop. Perhaps you can tackle some work for the next day to get ahead. Being a little ahead gives you the flexibility to take care of inevitable emergencies without falling behind in productivity.
- Recognize when you need a break. People are not machines so your schedule should reflect that. Realistic break times should be part of even the busiest schedule.
By planning your time wisely, you’ll accomplish more and be able to reap the many benefits of true relaxation when you’re done. It’s well worth the effort!
We learn at an early age that we don’t get everything we want. In other words, we have had to deal with rejection since then.
This may make you think that people accept rejection easily. However in reality the exact opposite is usually true.
But, in many cases, it can show who is resilient and who is likely to continue until they get what they want.
No one likes to hear negative comments about themselves. People take it personally.
However, knowing the reason for rejection can help change your direction. You can correct the aspects that made people reject you in the first place.
This won’t work with everything. For instance, if a person you are attracted to does not return the favor, it may be difficult or impossible to turn this around.
Then again, there are numerous stories of people who persevered even when they were rejected time and again, and won the love of their lives.
Another instance where you may face rejection is during a job interview. Many candidates will pass this off as incompetence on the part of the interviewer, and there are certainly cases where this is true.
Interviewers won’t typically volunteer this information. Many will feel you don’t care if you don’t ask.
In many cases, rejection is not personal. You may not have the necessary skills when seeking a job, or you may not have enough experience, etc.
In other cases, it may be somewhat personal, but it may be in your best interest to get rejected. For instance, if you don’t have an aggressive personality, do you want to pursue a career that requires one? If you are in sales, you need to have this driving personality to succeed.
Sometimes, the very fact that you are persevering is what turns the tables from rejection to acceptance.
Whose to say that next opportunity is not the one that will accept you? You won’t know unless you continue on your quest.
Also realise that the person is not usually rejecting you personally, but rather your idea/opinion etc. Reframe it like that in your mind and you can free yourself from the paralysis that fear of rejection can cause.
And the person rejecting you now, may well soon be your most fervent supporter.
Dealing with rejection really is that simple. Changing your state of mind works wonders for many areas in your life and rejection is another one.
You have to remember that you are your own worst critic, so when someone disagrees or rejects you, the mind can blow it up out of all proportion and really go to town on your confidence.
Having gratitude for what you do have in your life can really help and it definitely gives you a sense of perspective.
Take time to think about family, friends, your passions or hobbies, and the things you probably always take for granted e.g. having a roof over your head or food in your belly.
Another way to deal with rejection is to use it as a learning opportunity. If you have had a business idea rejected or been turned down for a job, take some time to analyse what may have caused you to fail at this particular endeavour.
By doing this, you can actually rebuild your self-esteem and come out even stronger than before.
Dealing with rejection can be tough but it builds perseverance and character and it doesn’t last forever and you will be a much stronger person when you overcome it.
Life is full of challenges; relish them and grow into the person you want to become and overcome any obstacles that bar your way, including rejection.
The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone Psalm 118:22
You’ve got this… 💪
During these turbulent times it is very easy to live in a state of constant worriment! At the time of writing, everyone is pretty much in a global lock-down which also causes a lot of feelings of isolation too.
But there is always hope, and it is even more important to find things to be glad about on a daily basis.
Here is a post about the science of gratitude.
And if you want to go deeper, take a look at the Grateful Mind training here.
Even the Bible recognised this basic human need thousands of years ago:
Be joyful. Grow to maturity. Encourage each other. Live in harmony and peace. (2 Corinthians 13:11)
However, when the news is filled with negative emotion and our surroundings are chaotic, it can seem overwhelming and stressful to be trapped in the house, full of uncertainty.
So, how do you find inner peace in these time?
Well, here are 5 things that you can start using today to combat stress and achieve inner peace. There are many more, but these are as good a place to start as any.
1: Meditation & Yoga
Meditation is great way to calm the mind and focus on your breathing in order to stay present in the moment. Yoga and meditation practices allow you to feel balanced from within and allows you to reflect on outside surroundings rather than consuming them.
Starting with a guided meditation or a yoga class on YouTube is a great way to start practicing without spending money. They will teach you breathing techniques that can help you calm down when you find yourself stressing out and you will notice that you are not as anxious and overwhelmed.
Alternatively, use an app like Headspace to practice meditation and mindfulness.
Yoga is a little like meditation in motion and so is also great for physical as well as mental wellbeing.
They may not be for everyone but could be worth a try if you are feeling stressed and isolated.
Develop A Routine
It may sound a little boring, but developing a routine, even when stuck at home, is a crucial way to find structure in your life when there are challenges put in front of you.
Waking up at the same time, making time to workout each morning, and reading before bed are a few examples of tasks you can incorporate into your daily routine to keep you feeling calm.
If you have children and are homeschooling, then having a routine is incredibly important for them too, and will allow you to get them into study mode when required.
Of course, you can also add a little spontaneity too, but the general day should be well-structured so you know what to expect.
Even though we may not have the ability to go shopping or be in public to get out of the house, we can always take our dogs for a walk or go on a hike in nature to relax and get rid of the feeling of being trapped in the house.
Nature is a great stress reliever that will help you feel gratitude and inner peace throughout these tough times.
Taking a 30-60 minute walk each day is a great way to stay active and get a breath of fresh air to reduce your stress and anxiety levels.
When you are constantly surrounding by technology filled with news that may seem concerning, your stress levels are likely to rise, and you will feel worried. When you step away and let go of this attachment, you will instantly feel calmer.
Beware The News
When chaos is going on around the world and there is stress in the air, the news is the main source that people base their opinions on and process information from.
However, the news is very quick to only announce negative news and alarming stories, which can make the brain feel overwhelmed, anxious, and stressed. The UK tabloid press is particularly good at this.
It is important to stay up to date with current events, but it is also important to not let it consume you.
Many of these things are out of your control and after you take all of the precautionary measures that you can, it is important to step away from the news in order to relax the mind.
Read A Book
Reading a book is great way to clear your mind and distract yourself from your surroundings when they seem overwhelming or negative.
It is a great way to restore your emotions and reduce stress without staring at a screen or scrolling through social media.
Whether it be an educational book, self-help book, or fiction, you will find that you are able to learn a lot and grow both professionally and personally in an enjoyable way.
And why not pick up a Bible if you are feeling really low. The pages of the Bible are filled with hope which we all need in these uncertain times, so perhaps now is the time to delve into the Word. You never know, it could be the beginning of an incredible journey of self-discovery for you.
OK, there are 5 things that you can do to combat stress and achieve some inner peace.
Why not try one (or all of them) and see which works for you, and if you have any that you want to add, let me know.
Stay safe and be strong…
Every day we have choices to make. Wake up early and go to the gym, or get an extra hour of sleep? Pack a healthy lunch to take to work, or buy something when lunchtime rolls around? Throw a little extra money in your savings account, or buy that new gadget or pair of shoes you’ve been eyeballing all month?
Deep down inside, we know which actions will yield the best results. Yet many of us struggle with making the best decisions – and fail to reach our full potential as a result. How do we overcome these challenges? Self-discipline is the answer.
Why Is Self-Discipline Important?
If you want to be successful and reach your goals, self-discipline is the most crucial skill to master.
Frequently, the best choices aren’t the fastest, easiest, or most pleasant. So you must exercise a high level of control over your emotions and behavior.
As such, if self-discipline is your foundational skill, you grow more effective in everything you do.
7 Benefits Of Self-Discipline
When you develop a stronger sense of self-control, you can expect multiple improvements across many areas of your life. Here are ten benefits of self-discipline.
1- Better Physical Health
First, improving your self-discipline leads to improved physical health.
Exercising control over the quality and quantity of food you consume, establishing a regular fitness routine, and drinking enough water help you maintain a healthy weight, reduce your chances of illness and disease, and increase your chances of longevity and vitality later in life.
This does require a lot of self-discipline for some people, but the benefits will enhance pretty much all areas of your life.
2- Better Academic And/Or Career Success
Next, self-discipline can help you to make choices that could potentially lead to higher academic and career success.
Sometimes you must choose between studying longer hours and spending time out with friends, or staying late after work to complete a project and heading home to relax.
Self-discipline helps you see the value of delayed gratification, which pays off down the line.
This is especially important in the modern world as the vast majority of people want it now and are not prepared to wait.
3- Better Relationships
Third, self-discipline improves your relationships because you become a person who follows through on your commitments.
People in your life learn they can trust you to do what you say you will, and they view you more favorably.
Having self-control and doing what you say makes you a more reliable partner, friend and worker, so all types of relationships will benefit from becoming a more disciplined person.
4- Better Control Of Your Finances
Next, gaining better control over your finances is another direct benefit of self-discipline.
While it’s more fun to spend money than it is to save, the disciplined individual sees the long-term benefit of putting money away for a rainy day. This is also linked to the benefits of delayed gratification mentioned above.
That’s not to say you pinch pennies and sacrifice quality of life.
Examples of financial self-discipline that don’t require total restriction include regularly putting a certain percentage of each paycheck into your savings account or sticking to a budget that allocates a certain amount of money each month for discretionary spending.
This way, you still get to enjoy the present, though, not at the expense of your future and you will have the opportunity to splurge out occasionally.
5- Fewer Regrets
Another benefit of growing more self-disciplined is that you’ll have fewer regrets because you make better choices in the first place.
You’ll eliminate such problems as saying the wrong thing at the wrong time because you’re disciplined enough to think before speaking.
This is especially important nowadays, as you have to be so careful what you say in case you upset or offend someone, and social media makes this even more difficult to manage; always think before you speak or post something online!
You’ll avoid jumping to conclusions, give yourself time to gather information before making decisions, and make choices based on facts rather than emotion or opinion.
6- Improved Time Management And Productivity
With an ever-growing list of things vying for our attention, it seems that time is often in short supply.
One of the best benefits of self-discipline is improved management of your time.
For example, social media can be the ultimate time-killer if you don’t exercise self-control. While it can be useful at times, you can easily fall into the trap of mindlessly scrolling through news feeds when you could be completing other tasks.
Have strict times when you are working, have a space which you use solely for work purposes and stick to it and your productivity will soar.
7- Staying The Distance
Finally, self-discipline helps you complete tasks and projects that you start, even when you lose steam or desire.
Motivation is always high at the beginning of a new goal.
Whether it’s a new diet plan, a new business idea, or even new relationships to a certain degree, when things are fresh, there is nothing but excitement and stimulation ahead.
Yet over time, motivation fades, challenges arise, reality sets in, and its tempting to go back to something more familiar or move on to the next shiny object.
Exercising self-control and choosing to finish what you start, within reason, even when you lose motivation and desire means you not only have the finished project under your belt, but you’ve learned lessons and acquired skills you wouldn’t have had you quit.
As the American writer, philosopher and artist, Elbert Hubbard once said, “Self-discipline is the ability to do what you should do, when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not.”
Understanding the importance of self-discipline, then taking steps to improve this most critical skill is perhaps the best thing you can do for your personal development and likelihood of lifetime success.
Did you know that a whopping 85 percent of people have low self-esteem? This issue affects their personal and professional lives, including their careers, their health, and their salaries. In other words, self-doubt and low self-esteem can keep you from reaching your peak potential.
These personality traits appear to be more common among women. They develop in childhood and either exacerbate or diminish with time.
Is this because of the demands of women to always look a certain way and if they don’t they are not considered the norm? Possibly, but in this modern world of 24/7 connectivity and social media, the pressures on men are also increasing so there may well be an explosion of self-esteem issues among men as well. And, I think we are beginning to see evidence of this already.
If self-doubt plagues you, whether male or female, check out these simple tips to boost your confidence and trust yourself more:
1. Accept Yourself
Self-doubt is part of being human. Embrace it and turn it into a strength. When used correctly, this personality trait can help you make better decisions, instead of rushing things. Think of it as a tool that guides your actions and keeps you from making costly mistakes.
Just make sure you don’t overuse it though because self-doubt can also make you question your sanity and decision-making abilities.
By accepting yourself and who you are, you can really help yourself to overcome low self-esteem and build confidence.
2. Know You’re Not Alone
Even the most successful people have doubts. They often question their actions and wonder what the right thing to do is.
Focus on building your confidence and self-esteem. You might never get rid of doubts, but you can stop them from taking over your life.
Talk to others about how you are feeling, especially those who want to lift you up. I know this may be difficult for the men out there, but it really does help. It isn’t manly or macho to suffer in silence.
Stay away from negative people because they will always try to bring you down and this can have devastating effects on your feeling of self-worth. This can be very difficult if these are close friends or, even worse, family, but it must be done for your own benefit.
3. Get the Facts
Your doubts don’t necessarily reflect the truth. Most times, they mirror your fears and emotional struggles. Think about your achievements and how hard you worked to get where you are today. Be proud of yourself and admire your capabilities.
Whenever you’re in doubt, get the facts straight. Research the problem in question, weigh the pros and cons and ask for a second opinion.
We live in a world where image is everything and the truth can easily become obscured, so take your time to look at the evidence and this will often give you some clarity and peace of mind and can banish self-doubt instantly.
4. Acknowledge Your Strengths
Make a list of things you excel in. Write down your skills and accomplishments. Accept praise from others gracefully and acknowledge your talent.
Celebrate your strengths every single day. Make positive affirmations and remind yourself how much you’ve done so far. Stop thinking of what you could have done better.
This is not the same as being boastful although some people may misinterpret it as such but there is real strength in realising that you have achieved many things in your life and you should be proud of that.
5. Choose Your Friends Wisely
Negative people can drag you down and ruin your self-esteem. Nothing will ever be good enough for them. That’s why it’s so important to surround yourself with positive people who support you and listen to you instead of judging.
This is closely linked to tip number 2 above where you were advised to remove toxic and negative people from your life, and if that is impossible (perhaps they are family members), to at least remove them from your immediate sphere of influence.
6. Define Your Values
Lastly, define your values and the values you live by daily. Once you establish those, you will have a more realistic perspective of the current situation. Focus on the things that drive your actions and are at the core of your beliefs.
Overcoming self-doubt is a lifelong process. Stop questioning your own decisions. Don’t waste time overanalyzing – trust your actions and put your plans in motion.
OK, so there are 6 ways that you can boost your self-esteem. Put them into action and see what difference they can make to your life.
It happens to us all. One day we’re motivated and the next day we’re in the dumps having ourselves a pity party. Staying motivated is not easy and lack of motivation can be a serious problem that affects every one of us.
But, it can be done. You believe it can be done and that’s why you’re reading this right now – good for you!
Think about this: You may have felt good about a certain job or project when it began. You were filled with enthusiasm and motivation.
Then you hit a few speed bumps and unexpected failures and your motivation waned. You may have fallen into depression and decided to give up. All of those positive thoughts turned into negative ones.
This is nothing new and, believe me, you are NOT alone! We’ve all experienced these emotions that can cause us to give up prematurely. All that upsurge of energy when we started a new project inevitably ends as dreams become reality and we lose our confidence.
Don’t be so hard on yourself; you are allowed to dream, and dream big.
The trick is to turn these negative emotions around and the best way to do that is to understand them, analyze them and find out what caused them. We lose our motivation as we lose our focus, our confidence and our direction.
If you can learn to control these three emotions you can control your life. Let’s take a quick look at each of these now:
Focus on what you really want
Focus can make or break your dreams, it’s as simple as that.
Be specific and be positive. We generally think in terms of what we don’t have rather than focus on what we want.
Try flipping this around; it’s also a good idea to be grateful for what you have and where you are at present.
You can find a great post about gratitude and self-reflection here.
Don’t focus on your fears but what you can do to overcome them. Don’t focus on being poor but on a plan to create wealth.
To do this make a plan to get there one step at a time. You don’t become the president of a company until you’ve come up from the ranks.
Focus on your plan to achieve your objectives and your goals. Be realistic on your goals.
Goals that are unreachable can lead to depression. But even small goals that are achieved lead to increased motivation.
Boost your confidence
So many people think that confidence is something you either have or you don’t, but, like any other skill or attribute, it can be acquired and developed.
To quickly boost self-confidence, you can do this by taking stock on what you already have and not what you lack. This is closely linked to the gratitude point made previously.
You’ll probably discover you’re more successful than you think.
We waste our mind power being jealous of others instead of working on achieving our own aspirations.
Don’t take your strengths for granted and count your failures one by one.
Count your blessings one by one and whatever your mind thinks it can accomplish.
So, confidence is a powerful motivator, but without a sense of direction, you won’t make the most of it, so let’s look at that now.
Without direction there is no motivation
You must create a day-to-day strategy. Make a to-do list and do it. Mark off each item once it’s accomplished and do not mark it off until it’s done.
You’ll eventually get tired of looking at it on your list and do it.
By making a list or outline of what needs to be done, you’ll find ways to do it and you’ll believe that you truly deserve success.
Don’t waste time by worrying about the future. Start today by doing something to change your future for the better. Today’s actions can create a better future.
Set goals that challenge you to grow, and don’t forget to enjoy the journey and not just the destination. And also, don’t be afraid to “fail” once in a while.
A great post about reframing “failure” can be found here.
Don’t be surprised or depressed about a lack of motivation; it will affect us all many times during our lives, but it is how we react to it that can make all the difference.
Discover your faults and correct them. When you re-evaluate your plans and goals from a fresh perspective, you’ll feel a new surge of enthusiasm and motivation and that lack of motivation can quickly become a thing of the past and you can move onto bigger and better things.
If you don’t know this already, habits are powerful things and have a massive impact on our lives, so it makes sense to follow good habits, doesn’t it? And there are numerous ways that will show you how to develop good habits.
Take a look on Amazon or in your local bookstore and you’ll see many books with “21 days” somewhere in their titles. In many of these titles, it has to do with some form of positive or good habit that the author is going to try to help you accomplish to change your life for the better.
Most of these authors will tell you this number is based on scientific studies. Whether this is true or not is irrelevant. On a personal note, I believe that 30-60 days is much more likely to succeed in instilling habits that last a lifetime.
When you perform the same tasks repeatedly for 21 days, they will start to become a routine. The problem with setting a hard number to this is that people may abandon it after they reach the threshold. In other words, if you do something every day for 21 days, after the 21st day, you may feel as though you accomplished the task and move on, but it is easy to “forget” your new habit and slip back into old habits if you aren’t careful.
A better approach for adopting new habits is to set up a plan that is longer term. Have milestones for the short term but project out for a much longer period. This way when 21 days passes, you still have a game plan to reference. This gives you something to shoot for after that time.
Another tip is to find people who are trying to form the same habits as you. Create times when you can all talk together, either in person or via some conferencing solution. It’s easier than ever to do this with the Internet. The members of this group can discuss what has worked for them and what has not been successful. Avoid the unsuccessful tasks. Try to keep the groups small. Large groups will force many members to become complacent and defer to the stronger personalities.
Being a member of a group gives you motivation, but perhaps, more importantly, it gives you accountability because you can make your goal public in the group and you won’t want to let them down, and they will push you to achieve it.
Here are 5 steps to developing good habits.
1. Start Off Small
It’s natural to want to make big changes to your life as quickly as possible but this is a mistake that many people make. They take on more than they can handle and become frustrated with lack of progress and eventually give up.
Does this sound familiar?
Instead, try to break down your big goal into smaller chunks and keep going until you can identify small daily tasks that you know you can achieve, and this will inspire you to keep going. It all adds up, and you will reach your goal in next to no time and you can have fun along the way 🙂
If you want to know more about enjoying the journey while tackling your goals, take a look at this great training here as it will really give you some insight into the fact that the goal is just the destination, and you can also enjoy every step of the process too. It is a real eye-opener and I highly suggest you take a look here.
I also have a nice infographic that you can view all about enjoying your journey 🙂
2. Get Crystal Clear
When deciding on which habit you want to instill in yourself, you need to get crystal clear on what it is, and what the desired end result is. There is no room for vagueness here. If you don’t know exactly what you want, then you will not stick to it, plain and simple.
Visualise what you want to achieve and be intentional. Use If/Then types of scenarios to trigger you to take action, such as “If I’ve got out of bed, then I’ll do 10 pushups before breakfast. This way, getting out of bed can act as a trigger for you to reinforce the habit you are trying to instill.
In a similar vein, you can simply add your new habit into your daily schedule. If it is important to you, then it is important enough to be put into your calendar and using online calendars, they can send you a reminder a few minutes before time. Simple, but very powerful.
3. Reward Yourself
Human nature means that we are so much better at berating ourselves over something we haven’t achieved, rather than rewarding ourselves for something we have achieved.
You want to flip this behaviour on its head and reward yourself for even the smallest of wins.
If you don’t reward yourself, you won’t be motivated to keep going (willpower simply isn’t enough), so use rewards as a positive reinforcement to encourage you to stay the course.
Whenever you reward yourself for making progress, you activate the “reward areas” in your brain.
This releases some key chemicals, such as dopamine, serotonin and endorphins, which make you experience feelings of achievement and pride. These emotions, in turn, empower you to take action and create bigger successes in the future.
4. Use your environment
Many psychologists will tell you that your environment can have a huge impact on the way you think and feel, so you need to use this you your advantage.
For example, Have you ever walked into your kitchen, spotted a plate of cookies on the counter, and eaten them just because they were in front of you without even thinking about it? Come on, admit it 🙂
The good thing is that we can use the environment to trigger good habits too, so what can you do to accomplish this?
Do you watch too much TV in your living room when you know you should be reading? Why not put a book on the chair where you sit, and put the remote control on the other side of the room? A simple enough thing to do, but you are much more likely to reach for the book, than get up off the sofa to grab the remote!
5. Go Public
I have already mentioned the power of accountability by going public, but you can also take this a step further by pre-committing to your habit publicly and attaching a penalty for not sticking to it.
This could be feeling guilty if you promise to meet someone at the gym and you don’t show up.
Or it could be financial, by paying that person an amount of money whenever you don’t show up. This can be a powerful motivator to stick to your guns.
So, there are 5 simple steps you can take to form new habits in yourself. However, if all else fails, you can seek professional help. There are plenty of coaches and mentors available to give you some guidance.
Make sure your coach and you both know what is expected of each other and have any provisions in place before you get started in case it doesn’t work out.
However, hopefully by following the 5 steps in this article, you won’t need a coach 🙂
So, what habit are you going to start building today?
Mindfulness is a tool that has become exceedingly popular over the last few years. But what is mindfulness? And what is it not?!
Let’s be honest; only a few short years ago the general public wouldn’t have been familiar with the term, whereas today it’s something we hear about all the time in a range of different contexts.
But at the same time, it could also be a bad thing because it has been misappropriated in some instances and many people don’t actually really understand what it means anymore.
So, with that in mind, let’s take a better look at what mindfulness is and what it isn’t – and how you can start using it to improve your life.
Mindfulness is often used to describe a type of meditation. Specifically, ‘mindfulness meditation’ is a type of meditation that involves reflecting on the contents of your own mind and how they might be affecting you.
Whereas the point of some forms of meditation – such as transcendental meditation – is to completely ‘empty’ your mind, the point of mindfulness is instead to simply detach yourself from your thoughts and become an observer. This way, you can prevent them from affecting you in the same way and you can also gain a greater understanding of the contents of your own thoughts.
Often this is described as ‘watching the thoughts go past like clouds’. The idea is not to engage with them or let them affect you but simply to observe them and to later reflect on how they might impact on your happiness.
By doing this, mindfulness allows us to take some time out of our stressful day to remove ourselves from our thoughts and thereby get some rest and relaxation.
But it’s not really just about meditation. What mindfulness also means is being constantly aware of your own thoughts as you go throughout your day. Some people will tell you to be ‘mindful’ of your body, or ‘mindful’ of your environment. But really what you should be focusing on is just what you’re mindful of.
Next time you go out for a nice walk with family, or next time you do something else that you should be enjoying, just make a note of whether you’re really focused on what you’re doing and whether you’re actively engaging in it… or is your mind elsewhere? Are you actually worrying about work? Or stressing about other things?
Mindfulness teaches us to be more aware of our thoughts as that way, we can decide that we’re not going to let them affect us and because that way we can then make the conscious effort to refocus and to decide to be happy. Whatever we focus on will determine how we feel, and mindfulness helps us with that.
Mindfulness is not mysticism or linked to religion and it’s not a cure-all therapeutic technique. All this is a tool and better yet, a state of mind. With practice, you can learn to be more in-tune with your own thoughts and that can change everything.
4 Mindfulness Exercises To Try
Now you know what mindfulness is (and isn’t) here are 4 exercises that you can use to become more mindful today.
These are simple exercises as we all have busy lives but take the time to try some of these out over the next 30 days and you will feel better and perform better, and people will wonder what your secret is!
The beauty of this exercise (in fact all of them) is that it can be done either standing up or sitting down, and anywhere you want and at any time.
If you can sit down in the meditation (lotus) position, that’s great, but don’t worry if you can’t; just do whatever is comfortable for you.
All you need to do is be still and focus on your breath for just one minute.
- Start by concentrating on breathing in and out slowly. One breath cycle should last for about 6 seconds.
- Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, letting your breath flow effortlessly in and out of your body. Don’t force it, be natural.
- Let go of your thoughts. Let go of things you have to do later today or pending projects that need your attention. Simply let thoughts rise and fall of their own accord and be at one with your breath. Don’t concentrate on any one thing, just let things flow naturally.
- Purposefully keep an eye on your breath, focusing your sense of awareness on its rhythm as it enters your body and fills you with life.
- Then visualise its path as it works work its way up and out of your mouth and its energy dissipates into the world.
Did you think that you are the kind of person who could never meditate? Well, look at that; you are already halfway there!
If you enjoyed doing this mind-calming exercise one minute, why not try two or three instead?
2. Mindful Observation
This exercise is simple but incredibly powerful because it helps you notice and appreciate seemingly simple elements of your environment in a more profound way. It opens your eyes to possibility.
The exercise is designed to connect us with the beauty of the natural environment around us. This is something that is so easily missed or taken for granted when we are rushing around in the car or hopping on and off trains while we are commuting to and from work.
- Choose a natural object from within your immediate environment and simply focus on it for a minute or two. It could be a flower or an insect, or even the clouds or the moon.
- Don’t do anything except notice the thing you are looking at. Focus and really look at it. Simply relax into watching for as long as you can concentrate on it. Once again, don’t force it.
- Look at this object as if you are seeing it for the first time. What can you notice bout it that you may not have noticed before?
- Visually explore every aspect of its formation, and allow yourself to be consumed by its presence.
- Allow yourself to connect with its energy and its purpose within the natural world.
3. Mindful Awareness
This exercise is designed to cultivate a heightened awareness and appreciation of simple daily tasks and the results they achieve. By doing this we can live in the moment and appreciate everything that we are doing at any given time.
Think of something that happens every day more than once; something you take for granted. It could be something that appears really mundane, such as opening a door.
At the very moment you grab the doorknob to open the door, stop for a moment and be mindful of where you are, how you feel in that moment and where the door will lead you. What is on the other side of the door? What are you about to do in the next room and how can you do it to the best of your ability.
Similarly, the moment you open your computer to start work, take a moment to appreciate the hands that enable this process and the brain that facilitates your understanding of how to use the computer. Wonder at how technology makes things so much easier than before and be thankful for that.
And these ‘touch point’ cues don’t have to be physical ones either.
For example: Each time you think a negative thought, you might choose to take a moment to stop, label the thought as unhelpful and release the negativity. Reframe it into a positive thought. being mindful makes you acutely aware of these thoughts and allows you to overcome them.
Or, perhaps each time you smell food, you take a moment to stop and appreciate how lucky you are to have good food to eat and share with your family and friends. Mindfulness and gratitude are powerful partners.
4. Mindful Listening
This exercise is designed to open your ears to sound in a non-judgmental way, and you can even use this to train your mind to be less swayed by the influence of past experiences and preconception.
So much of what we “feel” is influenced by past experience.
For example, we may dislike a song because it reminds of us of a breakup or another period of life when things felt negative.
And sound is a very powerful evoker of memories, both good and bad.
So, the idea of this exercise is to listen to some music from a neutral standpoint, with a present awareness that is unhindered by preconception.
To do this, select a piece of music you have never listened to before. You may have something in your own collection that you have never listened to, or you might choose to turn the radio dial until something catches your ear.
- Close your eyes and put on headphones if possible for better immersion.
- Try not to get drawn into judging the music by its genre, title or artist name before it has begun. Instead, ignore any labels and just allow yourself to appreciate the journey of sound for the duration of the song.
- Really listen to what is going on during every aspect of track. Even if you don’t particularly like the music track in question, let go of your dislike and give your awareness full permission to climb inside the track and dance among the sound waves without any preconception or judgement.
- Explore the song by listening to the dynamics of each instrument. Separate each sound in your mind and analyze each one by one.
- Home in on the vocals: the sound of the voice, its range and tones. If there is more than one voice, separate them out as you did in the previous step.
The idea of this exercise is to listen intently and to become completely immersed in the composition without preconception or judgment of the genre, artist, lyrics or instrumentation. Don’t think, just listen.
OK, so now you have an idea of what mindfulness is, and 4 simple exercises that you do whenever you want to bring mindfulness into your life. Take the time to do them and mindfulness will enhance your life in many ways, from being more appreciative, more optimistic/positive and more productive; many high earners and high performers practice mindfulness exercises daily so don’t you think that this is something worth doing?